well, i'm a non-blogger all these while...i dun do blogging n nvr will i thought of blogging up to today...it was the grieve that took hold of me that made me start blogging as i wish to store all those unhappy n sad memories as well as great ones down right here...guess this truely explains the reason to why i start blogging even though i used to dislike it...
things were as normal today...tried to get to class early today as the first lesson of the day is russian language...a lesson where no one can afford to be there late...but things ain't starting of brightly as usual...i was having my morning shower n stuffs...the very first bad thing happened in the morning to me *wish to keep it to myself only though* n it was rather scary...thus, i called up my mum after i got ready to go for class...called her up n talked to her as i was walking down the flight of stairs that seemed to be as long as ever due to the lifts which weren't working again...told mum bout the incident n i was told to get treatment once i m back in msia unless the situation gets worse n nasty...well, that wasn't really a big deal though as i thought, nth much to worry about...
reached russian department at 8.55a.m...5 minutes later, all of my groupmates were here n started to chat n crack jokes as usual till i received a message from my eldest sis saying that MY BELOVED GRANNY HAD JUST PASSED AWAY at 1.50p.m m'sian time today...n that was it...tears started to roll down my cheek like the falls of niagara...was it that serious??it definitely was...i really couldn't take it...was it a joke??was it a lie??the truth is that she's no longer around with us anymore...sad to say i cried n cried n cried as i wasn't even ready for this...it was so sudden..valentina asked me to go back to hostel n call up to my family but i told her i m fine instead...i do not wish to alarm all of my groupmates bout the current situation at that time but i guess that i was rather silly to think that i m able to keep hold of it from their knowledge...
ever since then, i cudn't concentrate in class...guess i cudn't even listen to wat valentina said back then as flashes of memories of my late grandma were there in my lonely sole mind...some of my friends asked me not to attend p.t after russian class but i guess i shudn't just stay at home all by myself as i wud start to think about this again...as a result, i went for p.t n played volleyball with my groupmates...i served as hard as i can...i wish to let all of my sadness off with every of the serve n spike...guess wat??it just didn't work...all i can do was to put up normal face just to show my groupmates that i m already fine...
when i got home, i changed to a white top immediately...y wud i prefer white to black??bcos my granny was a noble person..to me, she's as good n as pure as a pure white clothe wud be...i decided to be a full vegetarian for as long as i can...that's the only thing i m able to do for her right now...n i will be white top everyday for as long as a month if it's possible...she was my only grandma left...n she was 91 yrs old already...wat else can i say???she's lived a good long life with many children, grandchildren n even great-grandchildren...she used to give good advices to all of us...i really do miss her...i missed having lunch n dinner tgt with my family n her...besides changing to a white top, i prayed for her for more than half an hour...later on, i went to bed n tried to take a nap as i felt really exhausted mentally...i think everyone cud tell that i can nvr sleep in this situation...i cud only think of my late grandma n the things that were related to her...n as i think of her, the warm tears of mine wud just roll down n thus, causing my pillow to be wet all over..others might think that i m such a weak guy...crying for such a long period of time but all i can say is that even the mightiest man on Earth can nvr hide from his feelings n the feeling itself is even stronger than himself...
n now,both my eyes r reddish n swollen...it's only 9.15p.m over here...how m i able to withstand the grieve that took hold of me fully??i've histo class the following day...i do not think that i can study for the rest of the day...perhaps the rest of the week too...n the best part is that i've chem control n bio colloq this week...i'm so doomed right now...but what i care most right now is the lost of my beloved granny...i guess that my whole family is at the funeral parlour right now...the person who is worst affected by the death of my grandma wud be my mother i guess..how can i ever console her??i guess there's no way at all...
well, there's nth more that i can say right now...i'll keep in touch with my family back in m'sia for the rest of the night n i promise my dearly beloved grandmother that i will stay healthy always n be a good n filial son till the end of my life...u'll always be around in my heart n i'll love u always!!!
*this pics will stay in my phone, comp n mind for the rest of my life...*
*me n grandma before i left for russia during pre-med..*
1 comment:
My condolences to you. Seems like your granny had been playing an important part in your life. Too bad my computer can't display the sweet photos of your grandma and you.
I do have a granny now, she's staying with me. And I will appreciate her more than anyone else. Love you grandma.
Regards
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